It is difficult to age. This can lead to more pain, mobility problems, and difficulty managing your own life. So many seniors want to be independent. According to a survey, 90% of seniors want to “age in peace,” meaning that they will remain in their homes for the next five-10 years. About two-thirds of seniors require assistance with at least one task each day. It can be difficult when your mind is focused on one thing, but your body wants to take you somewhere else. Many seniors who require assisted living refuse to accept this.
These six strategies can be helpful when an elderly parent refuses assisted living in Myrtle Beach.
Ways To Help your Elderly Parent When They Refuse Assisted Living
Your approach should change
If you find that your current tactics are not working, it is time to try new strategies. Do not repeat the same message over and over again. These strategies may be worth considering:
- Give your loved one control. Do not talk about what they “have” to do. Instead, encourage them to discuss options with you.
- Instead of expressing frustration or fear, express your concern and love.
- Highlighting the many benefits of assisted living such as greater independence and ease of socialization.
- Ask for feedback from trusted people. Ask them if they think you are being pushy or controlling or if your approach is doomed for failure. Change your approach accordingly.
Back off
You might consider giving up on trying to approach your loved one gently if they are not responding. It’s easy to lose control of your life when a senior feels pressured into assisted living. Consider taking a break for a few weeks. This will allow your loved one to take a step back and think through their situation. They may even be able to evaluate their situation independently and decide that going to a senior living facility is right for them.
Show Your Feelings
A good relationship will help you feel connected to the senior in your family. Instead of telling the senior in your life that they are sick, discuss your feelings. Here are some scripts you might like to try:
- “I want you happy, but it is difficult for me to be a good father to my children by helping you with everyday tasks.
- “I feel very exhausted and you don’t seem happy. I am looking for a way that can help us both.
- “I worry so much for you because I love and care about you.” I want you to be independent, more active, and safe.
Do not tell them that they are a burden or an inconvenience. Do not tell them they are selfish. It is important to recognize your anxieties and offer assisted living as a solution.
Ask for help from others
Think about how you might feel if your partner tells you that your pants are too short. This is different from how it may feel if you hear this from a friend. It is the messenger that matters. Sometimes, changing the messenger can make all the difference. Involving other people can make your message more persuasive and help keep the family story consistent. You can enlist to support these people:
A trusted leader, such as a pastor.
Trusted physician. Encourage your doctor to emphasize the dangers associated with living alone.
A family member with whom you have a good relationship. Is mom open to listening to her son? Does dad have a lot of influence over the grandkids? Ask them.
A family intervention may be necessary if your loved one refuses to cooperate. However, it is important to proceed with caution. Your goal should not be to make your loved one feel bullied or forced, but rather to express concern.
Get Legal Support
You may need outside help if your loved one refuses to live in assisted living, but is in imminent danger. An elder care lawyer will help you evaluate your options and advise you on how to seek guardianship. Or, a geriatric social worker can refer you. You may feel angry or hurt for your loved one. This is better than a life-threatening injury or a car accident that causes harm to another person.
It doesn’t need to be difficult or painful to talk about senior care options. These helpful tips will help you change the conversation to make it more positive and enable your loved one to get the support that they need.
Call Reflections Assisted Living at Carolina Forest now if you’re looking for a great community for your elderly parent.
Reflections Assisted Living at Carolina Forest
219 Middleburg Dr
Myrtle Beach, SC 29579
(843) 903-0700
https://www.reflectionsassistedliving.com/